Prince of Persia 3D

Ten years ago, Yale University geek Jordan Mechner created the perfect platform game Prince Of Persia. Boasting revolutionary rotoscoped animation, brilliant gameplay and uniquely intelligent enemies, it was a colossal hit on virtually every computer and console of the time. It sold over two million copies and stood as a benchmark in animation technology. Indeed, to some it was the game of the decade. No surprises then that a remake has finally pulled itself onto the PC in the guise of a Lara-esque third-person perspective action/adventure.

Prince Of Persia 3D tries desperately to cling to its roots with bountiful running, swinging and climbing shenanigans, numerous spiked pit traps, magic potions and a corny 'rescue the Princess' plot. In that respect it succeeds. Unfortunately, what was revolutionary in the Eighties is Nineties' bread and butter.

Nowadays smooth animation is a prerequisite, and if the main character doesn't possess apelike agility, interest is minimal. However, what really makes action-packed swashbuckling jaunts such as this live or die is the control interface.

Out Of Control

Prince Of Persia 3D doesn't so much fall short in this department as collapse despairingly on its knees begging for mercy. Guiding the Prince through this bland land is one of the most painful processes you're ever likely to experience. He's slow, forever getting caught up on pieces of scenery, and handicapped by the most ludicrous third-person viewpoint ever devised.

The floating camera buzzes around your head like an annoying fly, undecided as to where it should stop. When it eventually settles down, it doesn't even point in the direction you're facing. Blindly stumbling along a passageway, hoping you don't fall over a ledge, or worse, suddenly having your head fall off because you couldn't see a blade trap is not most gamers' idea of fair play. Then there are the glitches and the jerks - it's as if the poor guy is stricken with epilepsy. Oh, and we can't forget the sound effects: they're not even in time with the action. You dive into a pool of water and a couple of seconds later there's a splash. Likewise, take a swipe at somebody... a brief pause... and eventually you'll hear the dull squelch of metal through flesh.

Fighting Talk

The original game had great sword fights - you actually had to time your stabs carefully, look for that opening and... Bam! Not any more. Intelligence on these automated thugs is non-existent - two or three lazy swipes with your scimitar and they're dead. It's impossible to remember a game with worse Al. In short, the fighting sequences are about as much fun as a case of syphilis.

Most games, no matter how flawed, usually have at least one saving grace. Prince Of Persia 3D shatters that rule by having absolutely no redeeming features whatsoever. The whole thing just seems empty and unfinished. There's nothing to do, no imaginative puzzles, no gruesome monsters, no sparkling waterfalls or murky forests, nothing. Just level after level of drab, repetitive running, jumping and climbing.

There's more atmosphere on Pluto than in this poor excuse for entertainment. Lara has absolutely nothing to worry about - Prince Of Persia 3D is utter trash.